Before you’ll learn how to stop self sabotaging, it’s time to admit it: you are your own worst enemy. Nobody gets in your way, more than you do.
Every time you achieve a goal or realize that you are experiencing happiness, you end up ruining it. You do something to sabotage it. And this is a pattern that repeats itself over and over again!
Let’s see a few everyday examples of self sabotaging in action:
Maybe you’ve been trying to lose weight for over a year now, but every time people compliment you on the few pounds you’ve shed, you jump back on the sugar train, thinking, “Just once wouldn’t hurt”.
Or you start imagining your exercise as “too much stress”. Before long, the pounds start adding up again.
Maybe you finally found the love of your life. They were everything you could have hoped for in a partner… Your friends thought you two make the perfect couple, and you believed so too… but then doubts started to creep in for no reason.
You started to think: “Surely, there must be a catch”, “I don’t like her new haircut”, “All men cheat”, “All women are manipulative”. You then started acting weird and dramatic, pushing your new lover away and destroying a perfectly healthy relationship.
The Pattern of Self Sabotage
I get it, every once in a while, everybody throws a spanner into their own works. I’ve been there, and it hurts.
But when it happens continuously, sort of systematic force that turns on whenever something good happens to you and is targeted to impede your progress… then something is amiss. It is a distinct sign of self-sabotaging tendency.
You might not even realize when you are acting like your own worst enemy. But the truth remains that unless you stop thrusting a spoke into your own wheel, until you break the destructive mechanism, you will continue to sabotage whatever good happens to you.
While you already know self sabotaging is unhealthy, that alone doesn’t change your results. You will continue to dismantle every good thing that comes your way, leaving yourself miserable and unfulfilled, just to rebuild everything from scratch.
So Why Do I Self-Sabotage? Oops, I Did It Again!
What is the reason you ruined the best relationship you ever had, one that made you so happy?
You may be wondering why…
Did you push away the person you loved so much to the extent where they will never want to get back together with you?
Why did you hurt your chances of getting that promotion after you had worked so hard for it?
Why this sabotage one’s gains trend is getting so popular?
For example, research testifies that 90% of lottery winners lose every single penny within 5 years of winning the jackpot – how could this be? Continue reading and find out.
You might be self sabotaging if these sounds familiar to you:
- Allowing the dishes to pile up all week, even though you know how difficult it is to wash the pile and you promised yourself it would never get to that point.
- Taking irrational and dangerous risks (physically, emotionally, and financially).
- Consuming pills that damage your body, wreak havoc your immune system, and upset your overall gut-brain balance.
- Talking behind a coworkers’ back, even though you promised yourself you wouldn’t engage in gossip again.
- Making a lot of money in business, becoming financially secure, only to blow through the cash until there is nothing left.
And so on.
How come that you work hard towards your goals only to trip yourself once you achieve success?
Here are the main reasons for self-sabotaging conditioning:
Fear of Failure
Maybe it was your teacher or your parents who made you perceive failure as a bad thing. In your childhood, you were probably made to think that if you failed – at anything – you were a loser; worthless.
The reactions you received for making mistakes were traumatic. So when you eventually hold abundance or joy in your experience, like a loving relationship, or a high-paying job, you cannot bear the thought of failing at maintaining that gain.
So what do you do to get rid of the build-up of that anxiety? You remove the source which is the very goal you put so much effort to get.
If you want to overcome fear of failure, this might be the ideal tool for that.
Fear of Success
Greatness can be daunting when you think about it. What terrifying heights will you reach if you unleash the potential within you? Do you contemplate and shudder at the thought of realizing your full potential?
With success comes responsibilities and side effects: more commitment, more criticism, more exposure, more being judged by others, more jealousy from others, less freedom, losing old friends; and so on.
Many people unknowingly fear these highly possible repercussions and shun success.
Most often, your personal sabotaging tendency is rooted in a mindset that is much deeper than the previous two mentioned.
When people destroy wonderful things that they spent much effort in acquiring, often it’s an indicator that they’re secretly convinced they are not deserving of those things.
Feelings of being undeserving can be expressed in thoughts like, “I am inadequate for that job”, “I suck at this”, “It’s too good to be true”, “who can ever want me”.
If you feel valueless, you will find yourself turning down opportunities, getting uncomfortable when others compliment you, and you will tend to downplay your achievements with words like “Oh, anyone could have done this”.
Because this whole process lies in the subconscious, those who feel unworthy will find seemingly good excuses to reduce the dissonance between their self sabotage and their goals (finding the perfect job/relationship, quitting smoking, losing weight).
They tell themselves stories such as:
- “It wasn’t for me anyway”
- “I’m better off without him/her”
- “I’m better off without this job anyway”
- “The routine bores me”
- “I love smoking, it relaxes me”
- “I needed to make a change regardless”
- “You only live once and you have to take risks”
The unconscious doesn’t only arm people with harmful excuses, it actually convinces them that sabotaging their endeavors is in their best interest.
Your Brain Is Designed to Protect You from Danger
Your brain is hardwired to protect you from any form of danger, whether real or imagined.
So may sabotage your results if you believe:
- Failure is a danger – it makes you feel like a loser.
- Success is a hazard zone because it will lead to more responsibilities you believe you cannot handle.
- Feeling worthy is dangerous since you grew up learning you have to prove yourself in order to earn things and your wishes and needs are not important.
One or more of these explanations could be the cause you’ve been sabotaging your life; but now that you know, can’t you just switch it off?
Why You Can’t Just Stop Self-Sabotaging and Enjoy the Things You Attract
You can’t just quit self-destructive mentality because you want to… and that is because you are unaware of the hidden paradigms involved in the whole process.
Sure, you know the negative consequences – ruining your success and losing the beautiful things in your life. But you don’t know WHY you’re doing it.
Forcing yourself to do the right thing when you’re in the moment, as a means to avoid self-sabotage may work for a little while, but that won’t work in the long term.
In the long run, what determines your results are your paradigms: the inner definitions that were created in your subconscious many years ago.
According to studies conducted by world-famous researchers, the subconscious mind rules up to 97 percent of your outcomes. Until you REPROGRAM your beliefs, your reality will run on the same course year after year.
And your biggest nightmare might come true: that things will forever remain the same… or even get worse.
This will leave you frustrated, and possibly inflict more failures, and additional self obstruction routines, disappointments, painful experiences and proofs that will reinforce your negative inner talk.
Check In With Yourself
Once you zero in on the root source of the obstruction, you can begin to deal with the problem. As you become aware of why you behave the way you do, you can start questioning your sabotaging motives and actions with questions like –
- “Should I really be spending all my money on shopping instead of investing it?”
- “Is it really too much stress to wake up 15 minutes earlier to meditate, especially with the benefits attached?”
- “Do I really need to eat all this greasy food now that I’ve come such a long way with my diet and exercise?”
The Secret to Escape Self-Sabotaging
My subliminal meditation can help you shift your natural default to sabotage abundance showing up in your life. It sure did help me and thousands of users worldwide.
The hidden commands bypass the cynical resistance of your consciousness and go straight to the source – the unconscious.
You can look at this method like a super powerful channel to transfer the data you’d like your system to absorb. And if you use this daily… the shift can be phenomenal!
How would it feel to nurture and enjoy the relationship of your dreams, rather than constantly fearing that it will end? How far would you go in your career if you did not keep pulling yourself down?
Wouldn’t it feel good to consistently begin the day with self-care practices, get control of your actions and start being on top of things?
It might be impossible to even perceive this idea, but you don’t have to go through the same old path anymore. Things can be different for you.
Why would you continue self-harming if you have the option to find healthier alternatives? Wouldn’t you be relieved to stop sabotaging your blessings?
Well, you can have all that, and possibly more. Check it out here.