Deal With Negative Emotions The Healthy Way: Explore Your Emotional Guidance System
Let’s explore an interesting way to deal with negative emotions by discovering your emotional guidance system. Do you remember all the warning systems that come with gadgets like your mobile phone, or your car that warn you about dangers like low battery, or no fuel?
Yeah, nobody likes when these signals go off. But we acknowledge that they are there for our own protection because they tell us when something is not right.
Your emotions work the same way.
Negative emotions tell you when something within your framework is not quite as it should be. This emotional guidance system, given you by nature, shows you when you are off your path, and that you need to care for yourself.
Paying attention to these feelings actually works to your advantage, if you know how to deal with them the right way.
It’s a call for you to explore them. See what they represent. Look for the thought patterns they reflect.
Each and every emotion you have is the result of a definition. It’s the result of a conditioned mental pathway that has been in your brain long enough to be molded and fixed into an automatic pattern.
If you have been working hard on your self-healing and find that you are STILL depressed, anxious, fearful, stressed, on a regular basis for no apparent reason – Most likely, there are other undiscovered layers of negative programming you haven’t dealt with yet and that require healing.
Those emotions are simply clear, hard-to-miss signs that point out areas in your life that you still need to work on.
Don’t Add New Problems on Top of the Old Ones
But what do we do when these signs show up? What is the best approach to touch base with our pessimistic emotions? What is our usual coping mechanism whenever we get stressed, or depressed, or anxious, or fearful?
We ignore these feelings and their causes, that’s what.
Because negative emotions are extremely unpleasant, many of us rather avoid them and turn to quick-fix things.
These will give us temporary joy – food, drugs, alcohol, gambling and etc. Instead of facing the real problem head-on.
You may use those escape routes to distract yourself from the REAL issue. However, quick fixes create new problems on the top of the psychological wound you already have.
And what happens is – you treat the obvious layer that is more apparent to you, and not deal with the real underlying destructive conditioning.
Would you actively ignore a blinking red light on your dashboard while you were speeding along the highway? Probably not. But that is exactly what ignoring your emotions is like.
So the first step is to stop escaping them and acknowledge their presence.
It Is Not Your Fault
Your eagerness to turn away from emotions is not entirely your fault.
Society demands that we do so, and we are all programmed from childhood to comply.
- “Be a man, and stop crying!”
- “Big girls don’t cry; stop being a baby!”
- “Why can’t you smile and be happy like everyone else?”
- “Must you get angry?!”
How many times did you get treated to instructions like these from your caretakers?
For many of us, it did not take long to notice as kids that adults reacted poorly to our unpleasant emotions.
But in order to ensure our survival, keep our parents’ love and approval, we use defense mechanisms that backfire on us later.
We quickly learned to repress those emotions, and today as adults we still push back hard whenever they try to bubble up to the surface.
You learned to frown on these unpleasant feelings as a child. Your developing brain attempted to make sense of your caregiver’s negative response. So the child you were thinking “Mom knows best; if she says it is wrong to feel like that then she must be right”.
It’s time for you to understand that being angry, or anxious, or sad, does not mean something is “wrong” with you. These low feelings are guidance signals telling you hidden truths about your patterns, which are meant to be fully acknowledged and felt.
When you admit their existence and allow yourself to experience these sensations, you can uncover what is really going on underneath. That is the healthiest to get in touch with your emotional guidance system.
If, for instance, every time you spend time in the company of someone who triggers uncontrolled anger within you, see it as a great opportunity to explore why you feel this way.
Repressing Your Emotions Only Causes Damage in the Long Run
Imagine you mistakenly put your bare palm on a burner while cooking a meal.
Just as looking away and ignoring your burning hand would not make the pain go away and could actually destroy your hand. Treating the symptoms and putting ice on the hand won’t help much either.
You have to LISTEN to the pain in order to deal with the root cause and take off your hand from the burner.
When your hand is burning, you can’t think, “If I just ignore what’s going on, then things will be okay”. OR, “my hand is in pain, there must be something really wrong with me”.
Cope With Your Feelings By Acknowledging Them
Turning a blind eye to your emotions will not make the underlying causes better and could actually make things worse.
You can view your emotional guidance system like a pain response in your body. It’s a neat system; one that works when you pay attention to the message that your body sends you, no matter how bad it is.
Similarly, if your negative vibrational frequency persists, it is a strong sign that you have not addressed the memo which those emotions are trying to convey.
Remember: anger, fear, depression, shame, anxiety, not good enough inner voices – are there for your own good. They simply want you to align with your source so that you can once again be on a path of well-being.
Looking the other way, telling yourself “I’m not giving into my pain”, doesn’t mean you’re dealing successfully with the negative emotions. It simply means you’re abandoning the clues your emotional guidance system is trying to tell you about yourself.
Feeling Good is Our Natural State As Living Creatures
We were born into this world complete and whole.
And then toxic programming was downloaded into your brain – but this is NOT you.
Your destructive conditioning is like a software bug, and that’s why you’re feeling down because this programming CONTRADICTS your natural being, which is to thrive.
Here I explain exactly why your unconscious controls every result you get in life.
When we experience distasteful emotions too often than not, it is an indication that we are off the path and something needs to be repaired. When this happens, don’t ignore it. Face it.
I know you may be terrified to make things worse if you look inside.
Perhaps you’re scared that if you actually acknowledge your worry and unhappiness, terrible things will happen. Maybe you’re scared to fall into an emotional abyss and will never be able to get out.
But it’s not the case. Temporarily, it might feel awful. But as you observe the signals your guidance system sends you, you’ll finally be able to know WHY you react this way. You will reveal those hidden blocks you were oblivious to all this time.
What Should You Do When Emotions Wash Over You
Be Kind to Yourself
First things first, you have to stop dismissing your emotions and repressing them. Allow yourself to be present without judging yourself for having them.
I had a hard time coming to terms with my persistent low emotions.
Despite all the effort I was putting in, I still found myself sad most days. I would often think in frustration, “Ugh, why is this keep happening?! With all the effort I am putting in, I’m SUPPOSED to get better!”
I’ve been there. I know how frustrating it can be, but I want to tell you to stop. Right now. Stop judging yourself for feeling. Doing so is the opposite of self-compassion. It actually implies a lot of self-judgment and disappointment.
It also implies that you are not enjoying your journey of personal development. Most likely because you want all your problems gone in a flash, whereas dealing with these things take time.
The second thing you can do after you let go of judging yourself is to practice mindfulness and self-observation. This allows you to notice the notifications your negative mood is trying to pass across.
Therefore, observe the emotions and try to identify the issues that are taking you off your natural state.
The third step involves managing the reasons behind the symptoms or negative emotions. So, instead of trying to treat your misery or stress, you can ask yourself WHY you feel the way you do.
Like I mentioned earlier, our subconscious mind is molded in a certain way. Nothing will change until we replace the old deep-seated beliefs.
When you NAME emotions and seek the root cause, you uncover the limiting beliefs that were cultivated in you long ago as a child.
How I Uncovered My Most Destructive Limiting Beliefs
After I abandoned the idea of trying to repress the feeling (which wasn’t working) and judging myself for it, I decided to investigate its source.
After much self-reflection, I was able to name this need I felt and said it out loud: “I need people’s love to survive”! And that was just one paradigm out of many which I was able to discover because I allowed myself to feel.
How was I able to discover this hidden paradigm?
I went all the way back to my past; that’s how.
I grew up in an environment that was overly controlling. I got screamed at constantly, and I never could tell when, where, or even why, the next outburst was going to come.
I lived in constant insecurity and I learned to bury my needs in order to protect myself. I was scared to express myself because I could not stand being constantly yelled at.
As a child, when I got yelled at, it was like the adults’ love was snatched away from me, and that can be traumatizing for a child to say the least. After all, as a child, you need your parent’s protection to ensure your survival.
Unfortunately, I carried into adulthood this constant need for people to like me in order to ensure my survival.
I would never have made this discovery so crucial to my self-growth had I not learned to accept and deal successfully with my negative emotions.
Realizing Your Programming Doesn’t Heal It
And once I cracked this code — WOW! What a relief!
I could have chosen the “easy” way and ignored my feelings and never discovered those parts in me. But that would have hurt me in the long run.
Instead, I chose to go the hard way. I chose to look into the uncomfortable depths of my soul and it was painful to do so, but guess what: it was totally worth it in the end!
You can do the same.
Sure, it will be uncomfortable for a while but once you are done pointing out to the source of those emotions they will stop to haunt you. You would have adjusted back onto the path of happiness which is your natural state.
Speaking of which, discovering those paradigms is only the first step, one that helps you understand your motives better. But healing yourself of their effect consists of something more.
It was when I decided to heal the negative emotions I was discovering in myself that I became so interested in subliminal messages. I explored their tremendous power to effect change in the lives of those who listen to them.
Subliminal tapes helped me make giant strides in changing my disempowering emotions and healing my deep scars. And they can do the same for you too.
I’ve dedicated a huge part of my life to spreading the word about the proven, life-changing effects of constantly using this method.
If you are ready to deal with your emotions and build positive neural connections, find out the steps to rid yourself of destructive mental habits.
Along with the need to be mindful of your emotional guidance system and constantly strive for self-growth, these tracks are the best thing I can offer you on your journey towards being a better you.