People Pleasing

Hello, my name is Edith, and I want to share with you how I stopped people pleasing. Today, I’m a recovered people pleaser. But back then I would put everybody’s needs ahead of my own; my family, my neighbors, my friends, my coworkers, even total strangers!

And you would think that spending all my life trying to please people would make me feel all good inside, but it did not.

The truth is I felt terrible inside.

I felt used and taken for granted. Every time I pushed what I really wanted to please people, I was powerless and unable to stand up for myself.

Yep, that was me. I was so scared of confrontation, I would go to any lengths to avoid it. Whenever I noticed someone took advantage of me, rather than confront them, I would just phase away; lose contact with them.

After many years of abandoning my own needs, I eventually fell into depression. I knew I must stop the people pleasing cycle. I tried, but it seemed I was doomed to stay a people pleaser forever.
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Fake it till you make it

A few years ago, everybody got excited about a new buzz phrase that was supposed to be “life-changing”: Fake it till you make it! You may have heard of this phrase or maybe even used it, hoping to manifest your ideal self.

Well, news flash: it doesn’t work… and there is a simple reason why.

Fake it till you make it revolves around creating an image for the outside world that is NOT you. It forces you to pretend to become someone that is different from who you really are.

The continuous presenting of false behaviors which are not in alignment with who you really are leaves you depressed, anxious and disconnect from your inner self.

Instead of motivating yourself from a standpoint of “What kind of person do I want to be?” you motivate yourself from a profoundly limiting standpoint of “How do THEY perceive me?”
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Strong sense of self

Here are some questions anybody with a strong sense of self should know how to answer: “Who are you?”, “What is your identity?”, and “Why do you like what you like?”

Ask these questions to a random stranger on the street, and you are likely to draw many blanks (and a few odd stares!). But these are just some of the questions pertaining to your sense of self.

Yes, you — remember you? You have a self. And it’s time you two got reintroduced.

You see, so many of us go through life on autopilot, distracted by running errands, commitments, and technology.  We never stop to answer the most important questions of all which are those which belong to our very selves.
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How to manifest your desires
Are you tired of daydreaming about your goals to no avail? Maybe you’ve been trying to manifest your desire for a while now and have nothing to show for your efforts.

Today I will share with you one major component you may have overlooked that will 10x your ability to manifest your ideal reality. After applying this method, things will start moving so fast you won’t believe it’s actually happening!

Are you ready?

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How to deal with daily problems

Everybody has one of those days when so many things tend to go wrong, and life makes you want to pull your hair out or run screaming to the nearest bar. But what if I told you that these everyday emotional triggers were actually a good thing…?

Don’t start shaking your head just yet.

I’m not talking necessarily about big problems like being broke or failing to get the promotion you thought you were a shoe-in for or breaking up with the love of your life (though the method I’m about to share with you is super powerful when it comes to the big problems as well.)

Everyday annoyances; that’s what I’m talking about: a driver cuts you in line, a cyclist takes the whole lane and forces you to drive at their pace, a rude cashier at your local grocers who seems to have forgotten how to smile.

What if I told you these small everyday problems which we take personally, were actually pointers to parts of our inner selves which we are oblivious to? Yes – these emotional triggers are your teachers.

Stay with me and I will explain how these issues we deal with every day are actually GOLDEN NUGGETS which are a mirror to our inner programming.

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Negative emotions can be a good thing

Let’s explore an interesting way on how to deal with negative emotions. You remember all the warning systems that come with gadgets like your mobile phone, or your car that warn you about dangers like low battery, or no fuel?

Yeah, nobody likes when these signals go off. But we acknowledge that they are there for our own protection because they tell us when something is not right.

Your negative emotions work the same way.

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Listen, I get it: you want a change in your life and you want it yesterday. You’re tired of the same old painful patterns that make up the story of your life: toxic relationships, lonely weekends, soul-crushing debt, paralyzing self-doubt.

If only you could get one magic bullet that would make it all go away in an instant, with no effort required on your part, then that would be awesome. Right?

Too many times in the past, I have received countless emails from all over the world from people who make requests that go like this –

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Your life can be so difficult when you walk around burdened with the feeling that you have to live up to somebody else’s standards. You walk around with your head down – and why shouldn’t you? You think you are not good enough. Deep down you know it.

If only you were better looking… maybe you wouldn’t feel so small whenever you go out with your friends.

Or when you make more money… you would be happier.

If you could get that promotion… then you would probably be proud of you and you could hold your head high during the next family reunion.

Can you see where this is going?

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Have you ever wondered why you feel ashamed? Not feeling proud of who you are, afraid to be seen, or tending to be apologetic for almost everything?

I want to explain the root of shame through a case study.

Little Timmy’s Story

Let’s take Timmy, for example. Timmy grew up in a house of an alcoholic father, who physically and emotionally hurt him, and a codependent neglecting mother, who was barely there for Timmy.

She was constantly fearing the frightening side effects of not standing by her husband’s “side.”

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How to overcome envy

I’m sure you’ve felt it… that searing, sick feeling when someone you know – a dear, close friend, a family member, an old rival – gets something you desperately want. You hate when jealousy creeps in, but you can’t bring yourself to overcome envy.

Your best friend just got a promotion and is now earning more money than you. Or maybe it’s something that you just know is trivial, but it still stings – something as frivolous as who gets more likes on social media.

Malcolm X famously said: “Envy blinds men and makes it impossible for them to think clearly.” That, right there, is the problem with trying to overcome envy.

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